Am I THAT chick before THE chick?

So last night I found out that Mr. Y is getting married and I actually found out by DoubleTrouble (I’ll tell ya about him later). I don’t know how I felt about it, but in retrospect I was getting signs all along that maybe that was about to happen. Once again I don’t know how I feel. I had that feeling like I wanted to cry or make myself cry but really why? I think that the thing that got to me the most is that I feel like that chick your with before the chick that you end up marrying. Yep that really got to me. If you read my tis the season post then you probably pick up that I know/knew Mr. Y isn’t for me but damn, what/who is?

It is really funny how I’m beginning to open up about my personal experiences especially relationships. I started this blog as a way to cope with moving to a different city and it became an outlet of some sort to me. But really I’m very private, especially when it comes to relationships. And when it comes to Mr. Y, he’s totally off subject. Even when I found out last night I was reluctant to even mention it to my BFF. I ended up text’n her and she asked if I wanted to talk (that’s major because she has a newborn and we don’t have weekly phone dates anymore). Of course I said no and pushed my feelings to the area where it will only be brought up if I do it (hint, hint… don’t-ask-won’t-tell).

So you may be assuming that I'm making a big deal and this may be the first time that its happened. But no, case in point:
 
- Mr. YY- started dating a chick and became engaged to her
-Boy Next Door- got this chick preggars (after we made a 'no pregnancy' pact, maybe lame), sometime after the baby they got married 
I kinda just ended there but I could go on, LoL!!!

My friend put it into perspective tonight as I was telling her. I basically prepped him and he married the
next chick. But then again, did I really prep him? After telling my cousin, it became more evident and clear. He was not the one for me and I am not the one for him. If we just 'kicked' it in October and now he's engaged I think its safe to assume that he cheated on his fiance. And really, would I want to be with a guy, marry him (he's cheated and will continue to cheat) for the sake of saying I'm married. No deal. I just think the part that gets to me is not being given the chance.  Or asked the question. Or been held in that regard of love. *sigh*
 
I have no clue who the chick is, what she looks like nothing; and I'd like to keep it that way. I'm not into the let-me-see-what-she-looks-like-I-look-better. No need to compare or anything because to me I'm ONLY in competition with myself and that's in regard to ANY chick. Funny thing is, out of all my ex's that have done me wrong I continue to pray for them. My prayer is that they can be the man God wants them to be. Honestly,every guy that has done me wrong has come back and apologized, and I'm certain he won't be different (just not sure when, LoL). Looking at how things that have happened to and for me, I know that whatever God has for me. it's for me. I'll get what's suppossed to be mine exactly when He's ready. So maybe, its not me actually prepping dudes to marry another; but God prepping me for the type of love he speaks about in 1 Corinthians. #Realtalk I do have a lot to learn in regard to those verses especially patience!!!

52 Week Savings Update 3

Ok, ok, let me be the first to admit... I am SUCKING at this (please insert sad face and booing noises). I think the main thing is,  I HATE having cash around me. The goal of my co-workers and I were to put the money that we saved by the second week in Jan. in an account <- let's just say that didn't happen.

Funny thing is... I'm some of my co-workers accountability partner in regard to working out however I need you all to hold me accountable in this regard. Starting next Monday I am going to get back on track and have the total amount that I'm suppose to save available. Actually, I don't even have the total amount we should have collected. That last statement was very sad, but please believe that I will get it together because I have faith as well as a goal to get a new Mac after the savings plan. I will definitely be back to tell you the total amount of money we should have. More than likely I'll edit below in a different color. If any of you are interested in the spreadsheet, please leave your e-mail and I'll get that sent to you.  The only way that we're going to do this is together sooo.... HOLD ME ACCOUNTABLE. You can reach me here, by e-mail, or via twitter.

I Nailed It

If you know me you'd know I hate polishing my nails. I hate when you smudge your nails right after you've painted them. I hate when they start to chip and I don't know how women find the time to do them. So for the past season I've been painting my nails. The funny thing is I ALWAYS buy polish but hardly ever use it. The reason for my post today is because I actually tried a new nail product and a few of you Youtubers were interested. I found this product as I stalking Youtube and was excited to try it. Just to show  you guy my nails

I tried this out on Friday and although I'm right handed, my left hand turned out a lot better. I will say that after the first time using the product I know what not to do now. Do not look too closely because you will see where I had issues applying. I say for $8 and a 3 step process it totally beats out real minx!!! So what did I actually use you're thinking...

I bet you thought it was Minx... gotcha!!! I used regular ole trusty Sally Hansen. The product is Salon Effects and you actually get a salon effect. The design that I chose was Houndstooth but Walmart has plenty to choose from. I think I won't to try the leopard print, lace, and the glitter options. As I mentioned earlier it was pretty easy to apply. All I did was shaped my nails with the with the file that's provided in the box (the hot pink side). Afterward, I pushed my cuticles back. And next I smoothed my nail surface with the grey side. And swiped my nail with nail polish remover, then applied the houndstooth strip. After applying you shape the remainder polish of with the light pink side. I know you're thinking polish... yes the strips are actual polish. I've only had the polish on for 2 days now and I think the true test of time will happen tonight when I wash my hair. 

I can feel a bit of the top portion pulling a bit, but its because I put bigger strips on my teeny nails.

I can't lie I was feeling myself a bit, so I decided to do my toes too, LoL!!!

 

So I put the houndstooth on my big toe and painted the rest fuchsia. Just in case you're wondering there were extra strips in the box <- I'm not sure how many but I used 2 additional on my toes and gave one to my cousin. All in all you guys should try the product too and let me know what you think.