Sunday, June 20, 2010

A Father After Father's Day

DISCLAIMER- this post was written almost 2 yrs ago but I never published it. Thought now would be a great time since it Father's Day and my Birthday!!!

So I grew up in a non-traditional yet traditional way. I lived with my grandparents from kindergarten until the second grade, then I made a choice to live with my moma third through sixth, and then back to my grandparents. This was not a social service act, just me learning the importance of choices at an early age. I say 'traditional, yet non-traditional' because I had two adults in the home who weren't my biological parents yet, instilled old school values in me.

From day one, my grandfather played the role of my father, spoiling me, picking me up from school, cooking for me and whatever else I may have needed or wanted (okay I admit I might have been spoiled a bit). At an early age it was apparent who would look out for me/take care of me. However as a kid I couldn't understand why my father didn't taking care of me. I was born on Father's Day and I think/thought that I could and am the greatest gift ever.

As an adult the saying 'everything comes full circle' is certainly visible in our relationship. Something that I had to accept, is that there is no 'tried and true' manual on fatherhood, motherhood, or better yet parenthood. Through the years the trials and errors that my father and I have experienced has totally strengthened our bond.

It is totally ironic that my grandfather actually pushed me towards this relationship and it has grown ever since. I know that everything happens for a reason and I believe that God had this relationship in the works so that when my mom passed my dad could resume responsibility as a parent.

I am beyond elated and ecstatic at the dynamic of our relationship of my father and I. I totally feel like we can talk about anything. Although I didn't have the feeling of 'daddy's little girl' I totally feel like my dad makes it up to me in my adulthood. I don't ask for much from him but I totally believe that if I needed him for anything he'd be my biggest advocate.

Although I was born on father's day and still believe that a birth of a child on that day is the greatest gift... my dad became a father, after Father's Day. To John L. Sconiers lll, Happy Father's Day and many more to come from me to you.

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